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Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Process of Elimination

*WARNING: this blog post will deal with more adult themes (relationships and affairs).  No, there are no disgusting descriptions.  Just the topics.  Read on with discretion.  And remember who's writing's naive Angelica.*

Some of you are familiar with the singer/songwriter Ed Sheeran.  He's a Rupert Grint look-a-like, a British redhead, and is widely popular with his song "Thinking Out Loud".  Seriously, if you haven't watched the music video, stop reading this and go find it.  You will die from the adorableness.

His song "Don't", reached the Top Ten in the US in 2014.  It's more intense than your usual break up songs.  It's more of a casual telling of the relationship with a passive aggressive response.  In the original version of the song, he uses the f-word in the chorus.  However, in most of the recordings you find now, particularly on Spotify, the word has been removed.

The first verse of the song recounts how Sheeran entered into this relationship.  And yes, it insinuates some inappropriate actions.  Again, use your discretion when listening to this song, especially with younger children around.

Verse two.  Now, he's describing how their relationship works.  They both make money the same way "four cities, two planes the same day".  "For a couple weeks I only wanna see her".  (Hey, a one woman man, nice!)  Before, he could only reach her by text message, but now "she's staying at my place and loves the way I treat her."  Remember that last part...she loves the way he treats her.  That's very key for the third verse of this song.

But verse two isn't all fine and dandy.  You get to the end and find that he was confused about how she was kissing him.  Should have written it down...

Wait what?  She seems to be awfully fickle doesn't she?

Just you wait.

Knock knock knock on my hotel door
I don't even know if she knows what for
She was crying on my shoulder
I already told ya
Trust and respect is what we do this for
I never intended to be next
But you didn't need to take him to bed that's all
And I never saw him as a threat
Until you disappeared with him to have sex of course
It was not like we were both on tour
We were staying on the same ___ hotel floor
And I wasn't looking for promise or commitment 
But it was never just fun and I thought you were different
This is not the way you realize what you wanted
It's a bit too much, too late if I'm honest
All this time God knows I'm singing...

Trust and respect.  What a concept!  To me, that doesn't seem like the logical reasons for having a relationship that really had no intention of going anywhere.  If you didn't really plan to have commitment in the relationship, then why was trust and respect the reason behind all of it?

Because we want to be wanted.  We want loyalty.  We want honesty.  We want love.  It's inbred in us.  After all, we're made in God's image...and He wants that from us.

I think the line that strikes me the most in this song says "This is not the way you realize what you wanted."  How many times do we call for trial and error in figuring out our lives?  Sure, you might say, "But Angel, all I'm trial and error-ing is my college major!  That's not nearly as bad as figuring out who you wanna date."  No, I agree, it's not.

But it's all about commitment.  Trial and error is so often related to commitment and perseverance through the hard times and bumps in the road.  Commitment through the dry spells and the stormy ones.  Whether it's a relationship, a job, a major, a class, or even something as simple as a five minute conversation.  It all boils down to commitment.

Commitment is scary; it means we have to grow up just a little bit more.  And nobody really likes that.  But owning up to our mistakes is even scarier.  

We are all guilty, in some way, of backing out.  We either get scared of the commitment or we start looking at our options again and decide we want to try something new.  We look around and see all the potential around us and quickly become discontent with our original surroundings.  Now, I know God puts us in places for seasons and takes us out of them for reasons, but I'm talking about when we take control.  That's when things get hairy.  And that's when people get hurt.

Can we be a generation that commits to something?  Can we persevere and hold tightly to the Almighty God even when other people go through trial and error and trial and error over and over again?

Jesus did.

With you.

Yes you.

I want to be like that.

Do you?

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